When Chaos Turns to Absoulute Mayhem
by Natalie Teeger
Summary: When Sadie receives a distress letter from her friend in the U.S, she rushes off to help. Carter has to deal with his own problems.
1. Letter

When

Chaos

Turns

to

Absolute

Mayhem

**Written by Catherine Crisp**

**Edited by Emma Crisp**

**-A Kane Chronicles and My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic Crossover-**

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NOTHING I SAID WOULD MAKE ANYTHING BETTER. I HAD DESTROYED EVERYTHING important to my best friend. I had screwed up her one and only chance of fame and glory. Her entire world was crumbling around her because of me-oh, seriously. You think I'd do something selfish involving my friends? [O.K., Carter, yes, I see your point but that was a total accident…what! That has nothing to do with anything! Now hush! I'm trying to tell a story here!] If my _dear _brother is _quite_ done pointing out _all_ my flaws (not that I have many in the first place), I would rather like to get on with my tale of heart-warmingness. [That is too a word!]

It all started with a letter. Yes, I know, that seems very old and used too many times, but that's how it happened, so there's nothing I can do to change that. This particular letter was from one of my best friends, Ruth Diane. She's American and so she lives so very far away, but what I couldn't understand was why she didn't just email me. I sort of found out in the letter. It read:

_Dear Sadie,_

_ I have a matter of importance I need to share with you. I can't type in this condition, so I had an old friend write a letter to you. This is me talking though, not Spike. He's just copying down everything I'm saying…wait! No, Spike! Stop writing all that! No, I meant- stop writing! Spike, I didn't mean for you to- Spike! _

_Twilight? Can you take over? Thank you. _

_ So as I was saying, I'm in a terrible condition and I need you to come over to my house right away. Please. I need to talk to you. _

_Your friend, _

_Ruth Diane_

Well, I most certainly wasn't one to stall if one of my friends needed help in any way, though Carter is a different story. [Ouch! No need to hit! ] I ran upstairs to talk to Amos.

"Hmmm…well, I can't exactly send you to America by yourself…" he mused. "I'll talk to Bast…"

I was astounded. "I can save the world, no problem, but I can't go to America by myself?'

"Yes, I know, my dear. But does the rest of the world know you saved their planet from eternal chaos?" he soothed. "No. I think not. I'll send you with Bast. She'll make sure you arrive to and from in one piece."

"Amos!"

And that's how I, a very responsible teenager, went to America with a tuna-loving cat goddess, first class, which of course, I was used to and apparently had to deal with. Is there a 0st class, I wondered as I packed all the necessary equipment needed to have an acceptable trip in America.


	2. Almost Missed Flight

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MY SISTER HAD ALREADY LEFT FOR AMERICA BY THE TIME I ROLLED OUT OF MY extra super warm and comfy bed in the first class suite in Paris France. Amos, Khufu and I when traveling around a lot now that Amos was Chief Lector. It felt like when Dad, a.k.a. Osiris, the god of the dead, and I traveled everywhere to get away from the House of Life. At the time, I didn't even know he was a god. I just knew to hurry everywhere and not converse with anyone suspicious, which meant everyone.

I ran a comb through my bed hair and tugged at a rat. I succeeded in ripping out a sizable chunk of black hair. I grumbled and headed downstairs for pancakes, it smelled like.

I was correct in my assumptions. Amos was already there with Khufu, digging in to the apple pancakes that towered over them, waiting to be eaten. I shrugged and began to fulfill the pancakes' desire. I was on my second pile of apple magic when Amos cleared his throat. I looked up. He continued to clear his throat until he began to choke on that apple magic that had made my day. I patted his back until he was ready to move on. He coughed once more and spoke.

"As you know, Sadie is gone to America and most of your trainees are expecting you to teach them about…whatever it was you were going to teach them." He said vaguely.

"The Properties of Egyptian Magic." I muttered under my breath. Amos dismissed it with a wave of his hand. "Of course, that." He said, leaning back in his chair. "I will be teaching them much more _interesting _things," he said in such a way that oozed with sarcasm. "So I can give you an important assignment. So you are here with Walt, and I just so happen to have room in that mission for the both of you.

"We are having some difficulties that I believe Walt could help with, since he's getting good with transformation magic. This is taking place all over in America, mostly quite close to where Sadie is going. You two are scheduled to leave on the 9:30 plane to the United States today."

I spit up my milk. "And you're just telling me _NOW?" _I rushed upstairs to cram some necessities into my black suitcase I'd had for years that was, I admit, falling apart. Once I had finished smashing my things into it, I grabbed it and raced downstairs to tell Walt about the last minute packing schedule.

His reaction was as expected.

_"WHAT!?" _He ran into his room and came out two minutes later carrying a bulging suitcase at his side. Together we dashed out the door to catch the plane we almost missed. The flight attendant was _not_ very happy.


	3. Bast Leaves Me

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I WOKE UP IN UTAH BY THE IRRITATING SOUND OF A PLANE LANDING. I had red chair marks all over my face. I growled at nothing in particular and sat up. America was uglier than I imagined, I thought as I stared out the foggy window. Bast stretched and yawned. "I was just getting into the heat of the most wonderful dream I've had in centuries." The other passengers stared at her in disbelief and confusion. I glared at them until they went back to their own lives. Bast seemed unaware of anything outside her grooming session which caused even more stares that even my super glare couldn't get rid of.

Bast stood up and turned to me. "Well, Sadie. This is it." She wrapped me in a tight embrace that left me breathless. "Take care, my kitten-I mean, my child." She ran off the plane and lept into the air.

I walked unsteadily down of the accursed plane that had made me dizzy. I stared up at the place where she had vanished. No sign of her. I found myself wandering around the airport aimlessly when I was forced awake by a crisp, business voice that cut into my vague thoughts like a knife.

"Sadie Kane? I am here to escort you to Miss Ruth Diane Dash. Come with me." A tall woman with a clean tight black business outfit, clipboard clutched in her hand and a disapproving glare complete with pursed lips and slanted eyebrows. I followed her to a long, sleek, black limousine parked a few meters away. As I got into the sweet-smelling stretch car, I thought back to my first experience of riding in a limo. It was a few years back on my 13th birthday. My friends and I were being chased by two crazed gods of vultures and baboons who were inhabiting my grandparents. We were saved by a dear friend, Bes, the ugly dwarf god who saved us with the sight of him in a Speedo-which did not improve his image. We escaped in a cramped, absolutely filthy, dirt-encrusted limousine that sank a few minutes later. This limo was quite the opposite, which pleased me. I sat down and sighed, kicking up my feet.

"Um… if you do that, you might ruin the leather."

That was when I noticed the girl sitting next to me.

"Ack!" I jumped 300 feet in the air. O.K., maybe not 300 feet, but enough to hit my poor tender head on the underside of the carpeted roof. [Happy, Carter?]

Her skin was like Carter's, but lighter. She had purple hair with pink highlights much like myself, but a little more extreme. She was wearing a purple sweater decorated with a giant pink and purple six pointed star covering most of her light blue jeans. Her shoes were the ugliest brown a pair of shoes could be. Still, she was fairly pretty. Not as much as myself, of course.

"Who are you? What are you doing here? Why-?" I screamed. "What is _that_?" I pointed to a moving purple and green something inside the girl's bag. She had the dignity to blush.

"I'm sorry," she apologized, while pulling the thing out of her bag. I screamed again. It was-it was-,

"A baby dragon." The girl said, as if it were the most normal thing in the world. She flushed even more on her dark cheeks. "This is Spike, my assistant librarian."

"Oh, is this the chap that ruined Ruth Diane's letter?" I asked innocently, though I knew the answer.

"Yes," she admitted, blushing even more, if that was possible.

The Spike chap bowed his head in what in thought at first was shame until I realized he was laughing. I rolled my eyes. I would spend the rest of the trip with an overly blushing Hispanic girl I didn't even know her name, and a giggling baby dragon. I sighed. It could be worse, I thought. I could be being chased by a giant bloodthirsty, axe-wielding, maniac of a parakeet.


	4. A Parakeet Tries to Kill Us

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IT COULDN'T BE WORSE THAN THIS. FIRST TIME IN AMERICA IN THREE YEARS and I get chased by a giant bloodthirsty, axe-wielding, maniac of a parakeet.

The parakeet wasn't our only problem. We were also being chased by brain-sucking caterpillars, limb-ripping camels and man-eating fruit flies. What we did to deserve this boggled the mind of Walt and I both. [No, Sadie, I don't know whether the flies ate fruit or man-we were too busy running for our lives to wonder.]

We had just stepped off the plane when a pretty big herd of evil bunny rabbits with red eyes and dagger sharp fangs hanging out of their mouths raced by us at full speed. We looked at each other and ran over to where the rabbits were trampling some poor old lady's flower bed. The old lady's eyes were wide and she had dropped the shotgun she had been about to shoot the bunnies with. I couldn't blame her. These furry monstrosities were defiantly out of the normal for the craziest people the world could produce. That's when we made the stupid mistake of following the rabbits to investigate their actions.

The parakeet was gaining on us. Walt and I rushed into the nearest shelter, which happened to be the local Wal-Mart.

Inside was absolute mayhem.

Monkeys, elephants, small rodents and even more demon bunnies roamed the store getting into everything. I personally witnessed a couple of St. Bernards shoplifting a 40 pound crate of doggie treats. Walt ran off towards the cleaning supplies section while I dashed off to the hardware part of the store. I found a sturdy looking mallet that I took off the shelf and brandished threateningly. Just in time, too. I felt a cold chill down my back. Wind flapped my shirt. The giant bloodthirsty axe-wielding maniac of a parakeet and his pals had ripped the roof of the store. The parakeet squawked, sending a huge vibration throughout the utterly demolished store. I hefted the mallet and prepared to take a mighty swing and the monster when a putrid stench wafted through the store. I gagged and let go of the mallet. The parakeet reeled away and fell over in its attempts to avoid the reeking smell of bleach.

Walt put down the spray bottle and nodded to the mallet I had dropped. "You're going to need that. They're coming in fast."

They were coming in fast alright. All of them. The rabbits, deer, dogs, cats, rodents, elephants, tigers, lizards and even more deformed animals. They trampled past, leaving me and Walt utterly bewildered.


	5. Ruth Diane

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WE ARRIVED AT A HUGE HOUSE THAT WOULDN'T BE CLASSIFIED QUITE AS A mansion. More like the two hotel suites Bes, the dwarf god I mentioned earlier, bought for us after Carter was bitten by a snake he purposely jumped on, before Zia, a fire mage and Amun-Ra's temporary host, burned them to the ground. I stepped out of the limousine and gaped in awe. The girl stepped out and walked in, shouting as she took off her shoes, "Dashie! We're home and we have her!"

Spike climbed out behind her. He had stopped laughing a few minutes ago. Now his face was filled with even more delight. Almost…

"Spikey-Wikey!"

Another teenager I didn't know descended down the stairs gracefully, her violet mass of hair in ringlets. She flung herself towards the baby dragon and tackled him, squeezing him in a bone-crushing hug.

"Come on, Spikey-Wikey. Dashie's not feeling so well. You too, Twilight. And-," She stopped, staring at me. Of course. She had never seen me before. Twilight saved me from explaining myself, which I didn't like much.

"Rachel, this is Sadie Kane, one of Dashie's friends. Sadie, this is Rachel, the fashion freak of the house." She rolled her eyes. Rachel blushed, her hair swinging. "Why thank you, Twilight. " Then she stopped. "I think…"

Twilight rolled her eyes again. "Come on, Sadie, Spike." She started up the stairs.

We raced upstairs, banged open the door to the second room on the right-

And I did a very impolite thing. I stared at her.

But who could blame me?

My best friend was a horse.


	6. Changed

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I WAS BEING PASSED, AND TRAMPLED IN THE PROSESS BY DEFORMED ANIMALS out to get me for no reason _I _knew of.

Walt and I were stunned by the large quantities of demonic creatures that hated our guts down to the very last organ. Walt was looked much better than last year, when he was dying from a family disease, or, I guess, a curse. His however many great-grandfather was King Tutamkanum. [Yes, Sadie, I'm talking about King Tut. Now hush.]

I had been holding "the mallet of destruction," as Walt called it, until the giraffe in the front hoofed me in the forehead and I dropped it.

And then, after a moment of swaying, _I_ dropped.

There was an annoying buzzing in my left ear that I tried to smack away, which didn't help my condition much. Walt dropped next to me, in hopefully not pain.

He wasn't in pain. He was trying to avoid the stampeding…well, stampede. I decided not to attempt to get up, which was a wise idea on my part. The stampede was devouring the entire town, ripping things apart. Suddenly, all the animals stopped and lifted their heads up to face the purple clouds that stormed around us. Then they fell to their knees or, in some cases, fell on their faces because they didn't have knees. In any case, they were in pain and I didn't care one way or another. The stupid giraffe had done something to me, because I felt about to hurl, although this was an improvement over a few minutes ago when I wanted to die. The giraffe in question was one of the ones who fell on their noses. They seemed to have no choice but to fall, which was pretty harsh in the first place, but to be unable to get up? They must be feeling my pain, the kind of pain that comes from a stampeding giraffe hoof, but worse. Purple flashes sparked among the herd. A giant boom echoed followed by more purple, and some light blue as well.

Walt looked around at all the animals struggled at an invisible something that had then gripping their necks in agony. Walt's eyes flashed as he looked around and instantly understood. I could tell Anubis had told him something by the look in his eyes. "Quickly, Carter. Put this on." He thrust an emerald green and blood red amulet that shocked me slightly at its touch into my grasp. "Go and find Sadie. Give her this." He thrust another amulet at me, this time a deep blue and stormy gray.* This one felt warm, but cold at the same time. I shuddered. Walt twitched, then set off in a series of wild convulsions. I put the green and red amulet on. I waited for something to happen, but I didn't feel anything change in me. Nevertheless, I knew the amulet had power I couldn't see.

"Hurry Carter," he rasped at me, his voice hollow and deeper than normal. He was struggling, I could tell. "I know what's going on, but I don't have enough time-to-tell-you-very-much-," he broke off with a choking gasp, "I…will be a…mindless animal. Take me…if I am…small enough. If not…, please…leave me. Save…Sadie. Contact…Twilight…Sparkle. I can't-" he writhed in pain. "Can't… fight…the-," he glowed purple for a moment, then flashed a deep crimson. Then suddenly, Walt wasn't there anymore. In his place was a dark brown, very grumpy, weasel. I had been in too much of a daze to remember that I didn't know _where _Sadie was. I tucked Walt into my jacket, which he didn't like much. I decided to do what I could right then and call Amos.


	7. What Happened to You?

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I STARED AT HER IN SHOCK. MY BEST FRIEND…A HORSE? "AHH!" NO, A Pegasus. Ruthie had a grim look on her face. "It's bad, huh? If you're scared, something has gone horribly wrong with the world." I ignored her compliment to sit on the floor next to her, still in shock.

I collected myself and got straight down to business.

"Pen." A pen was in my hand.

"Paper." A notebook appeared.

"Chewing gum." Check.

I was ready.

"First off," I began in a serious voice I didn't even know I had. "Where were you when you became…" I gestured at her uncertainty.

"Like this," Twilight supplied.

"Right. Were you doing anything specific?"

Ruth thought a moment, then answered, "I was out on the tennis court. I stopped to take a drink. Then this purple and blue light flashed in the storm clouds that had gathered so quickly over me, I knew it wasn't normal. I felt like I was boiling in a vat of hot oil. It hurt so much! I felt like I should be on all four legs. So I obeyed me. How I wish I hadn't! I can't get back up and I can hardly do anything without my hands. You don't know how much it-" We were interrupted by some _very loud _Justin Timberlake.

Oops. I forgot to set it on vibrate.

I smiled apologetically, turning around so as to have privacy. Carters' voice rang in my highly sensitive ears.

"Sadie? Where are you currently?"

"Carter? Are you alright? Why are you calling me?" I demanded. "Because of this," he said. "Say hello, Walt." I heard a grumpy squeaking noise in between the static.

"Walt's a mouse?" I shriek.

"A weasel, actually," he corrects.

"How? Why? When?" I demand.

"Tell me where you are, and I'll tell you more. The tourists think I'm crazy right now. I just got off the plane to Salt Lake. Amos said you were in Utah."

" I'm in Sandy. In a huge house. With a clean limo. A _clean _limo! How _awesome_ is that?"

"Great," he didn't sound very excited. Well, pardon me!

"Hey, one second." I put my hand over the mouth piece. " Hey, Ruthie. Could you send a limo to Sandy? My brother and my boyfriend need to get here."

"Sure," she smiled.

"Carter, stay there. Ruth Diane's limo will come pick you up."

"Great," he says again, this time much more cheerful. Humph.

I ran down the stairs to tell the limo driver a very accurate description of my darling brother, who made me promise not to tell you my description of him.

When I returned, Ruth Diane and Twilight?, were having a detailed conversation about something that made Ruth whinny in distress. Twilight looked up at me when I came back in.

"So Sadie," she said, super casual, which made me suspicious of her intentions. " when did you get Ruthie's letter and at what time did you arrive here?"

_How was I supposed to know? _"I got the letter about 9:30p.m. last night and I arrived here…10:00 today, maybe?"

Twilight nodded like she'd expected that answer. "Well, then. Carter, your brother?, will be arriving shortly and I'm sure he'll have lots to tell us, or," she cast a sideways look at Ruth Diane. "to help us confirm what we already have suspicions about."

"Like what?" I questioned.

"Sit down and we'll tell you."


	8. I Meet 6 Girls With Colourful Hair

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SADIE WAS RIGHT. THIS _WAS _A SWEET RIDE. SHE normally exaggerates amazing things, so I didn't expect much. [Oh, yes you do.]

The driver wasn't very talkative, or nice, for that matter. She was silent most of the time and really straightforward, so I sat in the back twiddling my thumbs most of the time. She didn't seem too happy about Walt and his fur didn't help improve her mood. She told me to keep 'that fur ball of dirtiness that might ruin the seats' put away in my bag at all times. She frowned at my suitcase, and told me it looked like a mouse nest. It seemed as if she would be blunt about all my faults the entire trip, but she shut up most of the way. When we pulled up to her mistress's mansion of a house, the front door swung open to reveal a really cute purple haired teenager in slim jeans and a revealing lavender blouse. She greeted me with a warm smile and ushered me up-stairs to a rainbow colored bedroom occupied by another cute purple and pink haired teenager, my sister and…

A horse?

"Hi, Sadie. Why's there a horse in the room?"

"Hello to you too, dear brother. This is my friend I came to help, Ruth Diane."

Oh, wow. "She does have a serious problem. Can she talk?"

"Yes, but just-_neigh_-barely so," neighed the horse, Ruth Diane or whatever.

"Oh, am I interrupting?" A quiet and shy sounding voice wondered.

I turned around to see who spoke. It was _another _cute teenager with weird hair. Man, I had too many choices!

This young girl had pink hair and a yellow sundress. Her eyes were big, blue and curious. Her nose was small and so were her lips. Her face was rounded, but pointed slightly at the end. She had a very small build. Her voice barely made it above a whisper.

"Oh, no, Fawn, you're fine. But how did you get in?" asked the purple and pink haired girl.

The small girl quivered and so did her voice as she answered, "Well, the d-d-door was o-o-open so I-I-I-"

"You're fine," the purple and pink haired girl assured her. "I just wondered."

"Well, I'll be jiggered. Ruth Diane, is that you?" A Western accented voice broke through the silence Fawn's voice gave.

_ Another _teenager stood against the door. This teenager didn't have dyed hair, but she stuck out just like the others did, but in a different way.

She bore a cowboy style of hat tilted on her blond hair that was tied back in a braid. She wore a red checkered shirt, brown slacks and cowboy boots. She was attractive in a wild sort of way.

"Hi, ya'll. I don't reckon I know all o' ya folks. Why don't ya'll introduce me ta ya."

The purple and pink haired girl sighed. "for those who don't know, this is Annie Jaklyn, or, I guess, AJ. Any questions?"

I raised my hand. "One. Who are the rest of you?"

The purple and pink haired girl sighed again. " I'm Twilight Sparkle." Why did that sound familiar? " That's Rachel, that's Fawn, and this is AJ. Any more questions?"

Then I remembered.

"Twilight Sparkle!" I shouted. Fawn jumped.

"Twilight, do you know someone named Walt Stone?" I asked the startled girl.

She nodded very slowly. "Yes. We practiced…magic together. A few years back." She looked alarmed. "Did something happen to him? Is he O.K.?"

"well…," I showed her Walt the weasel. He squeaked once and showed no more interest in her.

"He mentioned you just before he…transformed." Then I remembered something. "Sadie, Walt told me to give this to you." I handed her the blue and gray* amulet Walt had given me. She looked at it and put it on. Then she noticed my necklace. "You too, then?" she asked, nodding at it.

"Yep," I answered. "Walt said to contact Twilight Sparkle. Did you have something to tell me about?" I turned my attention to Twilight.

"Yes, I do." She said.

"First, I'm really thirsty. Do you have any water?"

"Yep," she said, pointing behind me. "In the kitchen downstairs. Hurry."

I turned around to find a bright, round, and cheerful face right next to mine.


	9. Pandra Palma Pamina Pepita Panphila

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MY BROTHER'S FACE WAS QUITE HILARIOUS. HE jumped a good 2 feet, then fell on his, ahem, _derriere. _[Oh, yes you did. Don't deny it.]

The face belonged to yet another teenager with pink hair.

This girl's hair looked…natural. The color was much more vibrant than Fawns'. Her hair poofed up everywhere. She looked like she was ready to explode with excitement.

"Heyheyheyheyheyheyheyhey! I'm Pandra Palma Pamina Pepita Panphila and I want to **_PAAAR_****TAAAY**!" She blasted in my poor brother's ear, making him jump again.

"Hey! I've never seen YOU before!" she yelled. "You seem nice! You can call me PPPPP! As in party party party party **_PARTY_**!"

She was obviously on either crack or candy.

Most probably the latter, she was so jacked up.

"Good for you," I congratulated. "Now over here and be quiet for _five minutes_." I figured even she could handle that.

How wrong _I_ was.

She boinged over and plopped down next to me. And, horror beyond horrors, started chattering about cupcakes. I groaned. Carter grimaced at me and headed out the door. Pandra Palma Pamina Pecky Puh-puh-puh something or other continued to blab on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on and-

"Hey! HowdoyouknowRuthDiane?'Causeifsheknowssomeone,I**_need_**toknowthem,'causeifIdon't,it'llbelikewhenI metTwilight,'causewhenImetTwilight,shewasall-" here she inhaled deeply. "-AndIwasall-"again she breathed in heavily.

"andsoIroundedupallthepeopleIknew,whichis_alot_ofpeople,andthrewasurprisepartyinherhonour,complet ewithtabascosauceoncupcakes!" she concluded brightly. 

O.K.

She continued to talk and talk and talk and I really need to stop doing this, but it's as accurate as I can get to what she was doing. Carter came back and leaned against the doorway frame to listen.

"Um, can we get down to business?" I asked. "I'm getting, I don't know, bored?"

Ruth Diane and Twilight nodded in unison.

"Here's what's going on…"


End file.
